A Fools Revenge
by Doc Lee
Summary: They thought their April Fools day plans would go unpunished... They were wrong.
1. Chapter 1

Finally my muse crawls past the fog of illness after illness and delivers me a short little fun piece. No real spoilers, but probably would put this sometime after the insanity of Season 3 has been resolved. Hope it brings a smile to your lovely faces and as always, I'm open to all constructive reviews. Enjoy.

Disclaimer - the people that own Arrow are the people that own Arrow. I am not one of those people.

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The scream that rang out through the Lair rattled the numerous glass cases to near shatter point.

'WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?' Roy Harper screamed, his hands clawing at his mouth.

Thunderous stamping echoed in the subterranean space as the rest of the male half of Team Arrow sprinted into the centre of the room, Roy flailing about as his face turned as red as his hoodie.

'Oh God!' Roy whimpered, 'It burns! Why does it burn?'

Oliver Queen stood to one side of the panicking younger man, his face tense as he held his bow towards the concrete floor, a single arrow ready. The usually stern man shifted on his feet, a distracted tint to his eyes, 'Someone start telling me what's going on?'

'The sandwich! It burns!' Roy barked as he bent over beside a case and started puking.

'Oh boy!' John Diggle rolled his eyes and kicked an empty bucket across the floor to the vomiting vigilante. Stepping stiffly over to the table, eyeing the offending food cautiously, 'this sandwich?'

Lifting it to his nose, Diggle breathed in and immediately dropped it back onto the plate, 'Whoa, ghost chilli? Who the hell is eating a ghost chilli sandwich?'

'Who freaking cares?' Roy whimpered, 'Water... I need water!'

'Water will just make it worse,' Oliver's left eyebrow twitched dangerously, 'Milk. You need milk.'

'This was here when you came down?' Diggle called over his shoulder as he rummaged in the small fridge unit Felicity had left behind the glass suit cabinets, 'Laid out on the plate? What the hell possessed you to eat it?'

'I was hungry!' Roy snatched the carton of milk Diggle had stashed in the fridge, 'Why do you have milk in there?'

'I like milk,' Diggle shrugged and winced, his movements still stiff.

For a few moments the only sound in the Lair was the loud, desperate gulps from Roy until Diggle suddenly groaned, 'Thea told you it was there, didn't she?'

'She may have mentioned she'd left it there,' Roy rasped, his throat still burning, 'I can see the cogs turning there old man.'

'This old man can still kick your ass boy!' Diggle snapped, 'You get hit with a ghost chilli sandwich, I get all of my underwear washed in Starch and from the way Oliver's silently twitching like he's being hit by a taser, I suspect he's realised that someone put itching powder in his suit...'

'I'm going to kill whoever did this,' Oliver's voice held a venom that had both Roy and Diggle taking a step away from the archer.

'No you won't honey,' Felicity Queen smirked, her heels clacking on the concrete floor. Slinking past her husband, the now dark green haired computer specialist dropped into her chair and spun round to face the room, 'You really didn't think I'd get revenge for my new hair colour?'

'Same goes for me,' Thea Queen glowered from the bottom of the metal staircase, her vibrant red hair almost as bright as the grin on Felicity's face, 'a couple of shakes of ghost chilli powder in the sandwich is mild revenge for this,' Thea jerked a finger at her long red hair, 'you have no idea what Felicity talked me out of.'

'She had scissors,' Felicity quipped, Roy's pale face turning a whiter shade of pale. The former blonde froze when she realised the implication, 'For your collection of red hoodies. Not for... That. She happens to like... That, so why would she... Oh God!'

'What did you do Dig?' Oliver ground out, his eyes glaring death at the red clad crime fighter, 'Why did Lyla starch your entire collection of novelty boxers?'

'Dumbo over there,' the room turned to the woman in question, her unimpressed glare matching Thea's as she stood beside the shorter woman, 'Decided the best way of waking me up the other day was to dress Sara in that Arrow costume she wore last Halloween and give her a selection of sucker tipped arrows and a bow. I woke up with three stuck to my forehead and my daughter telling me I'd failed the sandbox!'

'I trust next year, when April starts up again,' Felicity locked her eyes on Olivers, 'You won't try pulling anything like this year... On any of us?'

'Okay!' Roy finished chugging the remainder of the milk, his cry echoing from the inside the fridge in his search for more of the soothing liquid, 'Never again! You are evil Thea Queen!'

'Revenge is meltingly hot sometimes,' the younger Queen shrugged at her fiancé.

'Sorry Lyla,' Diggle shuffled over to his wife, the suave smile splitting his face in an attempt to defuse her irritation, 'I'll make sure next year you aren't woken up by the worlds cutest archer.'

'How about the famous Black Driver instead?' Lyla curled her fingers around Diggle's neck, tugging him down for a gentle kiss.

'Still waiting Oliver,' Felicity cocked an eyebrow over the rim of her glasses, 'Silent and brooding is your usual setting, but now's the perfect time to start talking.'

The lazy grin that appeared on her husband's face fired a bolt of ice down Felicity's spine, the deviousness shining in his eyes unnerving her immensely.

'I'm not apologising,' Oliver shrugged, the itching across his entire body leaving him on the edge of losing control, 'what I'm going to do right now is use the shower in the corner and wash off this powder. Then I'm going to devise my revenge,' Oliver had slowly approached his wife as he'd spoken, his voice low and filled with promise, 'My revenge that will strike when you least expect it.'

'Nope!' Roy shook his head violently, turning and stalking past Thea towards the staircase, 'hell no, I'm not staying in this enclosed space if those two insane people start another prank war. My ass still hurts from the last one!'

'What the hell happened to get your ass hurting?' Lyla frowned while Diggle's hand on her back gently pushed her up the stars behind Roy and Thea, the former grumbling under his breath. Reaching the entrance to the Lair, Diggle huffed when Felicity's loud shriek echoed from below, her laughter softening the threats towards Oliver.

'Anyone for Big Belly?' Thea casually suggested, 'I could go for a nice chilli burger tonight.'

'Hell no!' Roy barked, the laughter around him drowning out his mutterings as Thea looped her arm around his and pulled him towards the exit.


	2. Operation Revenge

Thank you to SawyerG for giving me the idea for this little addition to the story.

Disclaimer - the people that own Arrow are the people that own Arrow. I am not one of those people.

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The red Mini slowed to a stop on the top level of one of the multi-story parking structures that surrounded Starling International airport. The dark night sky hung over the small vehicle as it turned to face a large SUV and it's driver, a slender woman, sat on the lowered tailgate.

The woman looked up at the newcomer with a grim expression. Hopping down with a huff, she approached the drivers door as it opened.

'Laugh and I will find the most embarrassing image of you and ensure it's plastered over every single monitor A.R.G.U.S. has that I can get my digital hands on.'

The bright green hair of the newcomer didn't dampen the deadly glare and the dark promise, 'I see the three amigos got to you as well?'

'Unfortunately so,' A roar of a motorbike engine cut into the night, a sleek yellow machine hopping off the ramp and skidding towards the two vehicles, 'They also got Thea.'

'I thought they got over these death wishes ages ago?' Felicity Queen grumbled, glancing over to Lyla Diggle, 'What the hell did Roy to to piss Thea off this time?'

'I think we're about to find out,' Lyla rubbed the marks on her forehead. The bike screeched to a stop, it's rider pulling their helmet off to reveal her bright red hair tied in a ponytail, 'Oh...'

'They got you too Lis?' Thea growled, her thunderous face scarily like her brothers, before turning to Lyla, 'what did Diggle do to you?'

'I was woken up by our daughter bouncing on my stomach dressed like Oliver and three arrows stuck to my forehead as Sara babbled about failing the sandbox!' Lyla grumbled sourly, 'not exactly the way I like being woken up of a morning.'

'I take it this is a covert strategy meeting to devise our revenge on our men?' Felicity couldn't stop glancing at Thea's bright hair as she sat astride her bike, 'how the hell did Roy find a bottle that goes as bright as it's left you?'

'Don't know,' Thea snapped, 'Don't care. Revenge must be gained and it must be swift and brutal. We need to hit the idiots where it hurts them the most.'

'The balls?' Felicity frowned. She was met by twin stares, Thea's including a chuckle.

'No, but I like your style Lis,' The red haired vigilante smirked dangerously, 'i'm thinking of taking a pair of scissors to Roy's hoodie collection.'

'You want revenge,' Lyla shook her head, 'destroying his beloved hoodie collection is a step too far, but you've given me an idea.'

'Oh?'

'Johnny loves his novelty boxers,' Lyla giggled, 'maybe if I mess with them, he'll think twice before letting Sara play sandbox heroine again.'

'I've put itching powder in Oliver's spare suit,' Felicity grinned and chucked a thumb over her shoulder at her car, 'when we go from here, I'm gonna drop by the Lair and switch the suits over, then wait for the fun to start. Should I leave the tub here with you?'

'Hell no,' Lyla took a step back, the unusual sight of fear on her face un-nerving both Thea and Felicity, 'I'm going nowhere near a tub of that stuff. Last time someone got me with that stuff almost hit them.

'An expected reaction,' Thea shrugged.

'I used a laser guided RPG instead,' The simplicity of the statement stilled the trio, the mother blinking at the flabbergasted stares she received, 'What?'

'You used a laser guided RPG as revenge for an itching powder prank?' Felicity stuttered.

'Freaking badass!' Thea held her palm up for Lyla to slap, the youngest of the group cackling loudly when the call was answered, 'So Ollie's getting sent mad, Diggle's getting his junk messed with and Roy? What's the plan now I can't slice and dice his hoodies?'

'Oh!' Felicity snapped her fingers after a minute of silence, 'Barry was telling me about the time he ate a Ghost Chilli to prove his... Something or other, I don't remember what it was he was doing but I know there was a woman involved.'

'Oliver's always grumbling about Roy's infernal meta human-ish ability to find food in the lair and eat it,' Felicity watched Thea's face light up as she cottoned onto the idea, 'One of us rigs up a sandwich that'll blow his socks clean off and we leave it in the open. There's no way he can resist a rogue plate of food. I can pick up the stuff I need on my way to the Lair so it's in place before the guys turn up later.'

'And that's why she's the brains of the operation!' Thea crowed, 'And if one of the other two eats some, then we get them as well.'

'So we're agreed?' Lyla turned to each woman, receiving nods in reply, 'Good. Felicity will set the traps, then head home. When Oliver leaves for the Lair, you,' Lyla pointed at Felicity, 'Will call me and I will pick up both of you so we can sit around the block from the club and await the idiots reactions.'

'I'll set up a couple of cameras so we can watch the hammers fall,' Felicity checked her watch, 'We have four hours until operation...'

'Revenge?' Thea shrugged, a grimace on her face at her weak suggestion.

'Four hours until Operation Revenge is active,' Lyla turned back to her SUV as Thea donned her matte black helmet, 'Look alive ladies. The game is afoot.'

Just as quickly as the three vehicles arrived on the top level of the structure they left again, with each driver smirking to themselves in anticipation of their different forms of revenge to the men they loved.


End file.
